Salt and Light (and something about Robins)

Salt and light: we are to be them, for there are the instigators of change. They are what brings out the true self. They bring not one, generalized group, but many more diversity than ever seen before.

When we compare ourselves to another person, it is a small, dim spectrum by which to measure ourselves. It is like comparing a robin's egg to a dove's egg; they both appear different, but for the most part, they are still just eggs.

When we compare ourselves to Christ, we see an impossibly huge distinction and a spectrum so wide that it is impossible to calculate. From the robin's egg to the robin itself; they look nothing alike.

Anyone who has been in the dark recognizes that the range of colors drops, depending on how dark it is. Everything appears dimmer, and details begin to fade. We see only dim resemblances of who people are. But when we step into the light, the details become clearer, more defined, more vibrant. If we were to live our entire lives in this sort of dark, would we think something like light would be possible?

Think also about salt. By itself, it is a strong, bitter taste, and we would think anything salted would taste just like this. But salt, rather than cloaking flavor like a blanket, brings the flavor out... kind of like light. The two images work well together to give us a glimpse of the kind of change God wants to do in us.

Back to the bird illustration, we were never meant to stay in the egg. We would then only die in darkness. We were meant to break out of the egg, piece by piece, strengthening our wings in the process. We become what we never thought possible, resembling more and more this robin that we hope to become.

If there is only one motivator for breaking out of the egg (because breaking out is hard, sounds painful, and from our perspective, can seem pretty pointless), let it be for this: so that the world can see a glimpse of Christ through us, and possibly desire such for their own lives. This is what evangelism is: allowing ourselves to be changed, so that the world may see, and change for the better right along with us.

Lent

For Lent, I am giving up Interweb, Television, and beverages not water. Therefore, I will not be writing here. For all that read this, think of this not as "bragging" but as a request for accountability. I think there's beautiful things in store when we sacrifice anything we love (or at least use in excess).

Therapy

So, there's a girl, and she's really cool, but really not your type. You both love music, but she loves everything you forgot to love, making her that much cooler. You both play guitar, write music, and appreciate both hymns and contemporary stuff. One night, you go to her place and play guitar for a couple of hours, then her teaching you the basics of waltz, followed by watching the Mighty Ducks and going on an Oreo Cookie run. Oh, and attempting the unsolvable mysteries of internet connections. In her car is Handel's Messiah. In yours, the soundtrack to the anime Bleach. In her room, art, clothes, and a giant bed. In yours, a computer, a television, and a meager bed. You're looking for differences, but none of them are negative. What do you do? Is there something worth looking into, or are you guys just friends?

God, You're the most important love in my life. Nothing makes sense without you in the context, and this is no exception. Nothing is clearer necessarily either. Oh, brother.

Lost in Translation

What do you do when you've found true joy, true happiness, true meaning... and it fades? Or rather, what do you do when you believe that you've found the answer, but you still have so many questions? I keep thinking of ways to rephrase this, because I don't think I'm saying what I want to say; something is getting lost in translation.
The true goal of any person's life is to be happy. Whether this is clouded in the search for love, prosperity, or just meaning; all things we do, in essence, is to bring happiness to our life. Our hearts long for somewhere to belong, some guide or place that tells us what to do next, or at least, breathes the necessary vitality to keep moving forward into us.
I think of new ideas on how to bring life back to what I have, to this life I must live, probably once or twice a day. I obsess over beautiful women, I read books, I watch anime, I meditate. To me, it has become this bettering myself in order to be happy. I'm somehow uncomfortable with sitting still, or no progress. But when I think about it, I have no idea how to measure this progress.
I'm stuck, but not really. There's this thin sheet of fog between what I want to do, and what I know I must do. Quick fixes, temporary sighs of relief; they don't cut it. Even faith feels like a breath mint, only meant to cover up the stench rather that relieve it.
I wrote a book last November, and somewhere, in the middle of the faux drama, clichés, is a beautiful story; it is the story of my life, for one brief weekend. It's a story of obsessing over beautiful women, reading books, anime, meditation; that journey towards hapiness, however it can be defined.
Between my head and my fingers, something was lost in translation, and I became to hate this story. I wanted more out of it. I pushed for humor, sarcasm, wit that the story never needed to begin with. I wanted something more epic. Basically, I was looking at my life, and screaming, "I want something more."
Here is where it comes together: in my head, I know my life is beautiful, not through the choices I make or who I am, but because of how it all magically plays out, and, like some anti-fairy tale, never seems to work itself out. I'm in love with real life, because it hurts, but it feels so good. Those moments where I absolutely crave for some impossible adventure, when the life I'm leading is an adventure compared to what some may face.

All in all, I am blessed.

The key to happiness, for me, is not changing enough until I'm okay with who I am. It is embracing me for who I am, and what is being done through me, and letting life, experience, true joy, change me. If that is what's required.
Somewhere, in the midst of text on a screen, is a story that I want to tell. It is the story of my life. And, despite this head that cannot seem to sit still, is a heart that reminds me, right now, that I am a happy person.
What do we do when God doesn't seem to be enough? We love ourselves, and see that all he wanted to do was the same.

The Mystery of Nature

I haven't written any poetry on here in awhile, so I figured, why not? This one is inspired by the Romantics, so it's a little more wordy than stuff I usually write.

Man is intrigued by the violence of man
But is captivated by the mystery of nature
Where once we sought destruction to satiate
Now, we seek restoration,
The ebb and flow of creation, bound to cycle
And constant in beauty for man to behold.
These are the things that are life-givers,
That is to say, that which is life, gives it back.
These processes, too, are cycles.
When we stop to taste the air
And watch our breath rise from our nostrils,
Our hearts overflow with joy
And with each death comes a new life
Born to discover nature all over again.

Art

There are two kinds of art, I'm discovering, in the most basic sense. One, I love and embrace, and one, I loathe and detest with every part of my being. There is the art of everyone, the creation for the sake of creating, the expression for the sake of expressing, the letting go of emotion and honesty through some form (paint, drawing, writing, sculpture, guitar, voice, etc, etc, etc). The second kind is the art of the expert, which incorporates all of these things, but only those things that meet certain qualifications are art.
Now, many will say, "Everything can't be art. When I take a dump, it isn't art. When an infant is stillborn, it isn't art. If everyone else is doing it, it isn't art." And I agree. None of these things, I embrace as art, and most people probably would feel the same way.
I'm not saying everything is art. I'm saying everyone has a right to it, regardless of skill, age, or whatever. I refuse the bias that there must be a study of all things done before so that something new can be created.
What I do agree with is that there are varying qualities of art. A sketch of a human that is more realistic portrays more talent than a sketch that does not. But that is not the basis of art. The point is EXPRESSION. If I can better, and more comfortably, sketch stick figures, and I have something to say, then this is art.
Expression, and having something to say. Merely to copycat for the sake of recognition is not art, because it doesn't mean anything to the person. Now, when we first attempt art, we recreate that which we've seen so that we have a basis, but after awhile, we must shift from imitation to innovation. We know that we've innovated when we create not to imitate but merely to say something.
Maybe I'm more judgmental that I let on. Maybe everything should be art. Maybe only those canonized by experts should be considered art. There's some middle ground that we must find, that everyone can embrace, and everyone can take part in. I don't have a definition of art, but I do have some ideas that have shaped my perspective.
And maybe, more than anything, that's what art is: perspective. Maybe we each make up our own rules. But, as with anything communicated, if not one receives the message, then are we really saying something?
Let's take nothing for granted, but let's be picky. Let's make music and listen to it because we like it; let's look at photos and take them because we like it; let's observe the world and recreate it because we like it. This is where art begins. To me, at least.

Okay, I lied

So, I said I wasn't going to use this place anymore, but the place I started using... well, it sucks. Here I don't have to worry about design quality, since it's taken care of for me. Uber.com is a wonderful idea, but in my condition, I cannot embrace it.
I'll add my entries from there here, I suppose, and rant some more, as I have done for the past couple of years.

Last Post... Here

The chronicles of BT Robinson (Crusoe) end here, and a new age has begun. Like starting a new journal, I have gone elsewhere to get my blogging needs. Check out my new blog HERE.